- I said no to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen... so I couldn't refuse.
- You can take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
- Where the hell did Noah keep woodpeckers and beavers on his ark.
- How to solve your not sleeping problem. Step 1: Hold your breath for 5 minutes. Step 2: Pass out. Your welcome.
- What are you talkin' about. I didn't fall, I just attacked the floor.
- Don't read this status --------> You Failed.
- When life gives you lemons, take them and chuck them at things you hate.
- Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end the way you want them banana.
- I love "insert name" more than a fat kid loves his cookies.
- Kid 1: God is real. Kid 2: Oh Yeah! If god is real he would slam my head on the keyboard right nowfjasdljfdlsjajfsdljflsdafjdlfasdrqwiropavzxc'vzc.
Old Spice Pure Awesomeness!!!!!!!!